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Post by starletinwaiting on Apr 30, 2019 12:48:45 GMT -8
Logan chases her brother, Levi, and sister, Lavender around the room, all three giggling. Their father, Eric, is out for the evening taking care of some business and with everyone else in the house being busy, he hired a babysitter for the triplets. Cheery little Logan hit it off immediately with Aurora, the babysitter, but it took Lavender and Levi a little convincing to fall in love with her as well.
As Logan makes one more loop around the room, the front door opens and fifteen year old Lucian enters the house with a groan. He slams the door, storming into the living room. The sight of an unfamiliar girl sitting on the couch with his siblings takes him aback. He slides his gym bag under the table in the hallway as he enters the living room.
He clears his throat. "Hey, uh, hi," he greets the girls, suddenly aware of the smell he must be giving off. "You must be the babysitter."
"She's great, Lucian!" Logan cheers, running to hug her brother, Levi right behind her. "She letted me play with my dollies with her and Levi and Lavender gotta play with trucks and we were just playing tag!"
Lucian nods, absentmindedly listening to his sister babble on about the babysitter. "I, umm, I'm Lucian," he addresses the girl on the couch. "I-"
"You just got back from running practice, right?" Logan interrupts.
"Track," Lucian corrects her. "And Yeah. I guess... that's why dad hired you?"
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Post by Joelle on May 2, 2019 15:16:03 GMT -8
She nodded. "Yes, I am. And thanks, Longan," she says with a chuckle. "She turns back to him. "My name is Aurora Andrieux, but sometimes people call me Rory," She suddenly has a memory from the past, of Ari, Asriel. and Eli Katz, but she also thinks it might be easier for the kids.
Gosh. Where had that come from? Suddenly she misses them so much, but why is she having these thoughts in front of him> It must be due to repressed pain or something. The anniversary of her mother's murder had just been at the beginning of February. God knew everyone, but especially Aunt Celine and Aunt Claire atill deal with the memories, though Aunt Celine's are clearer due to Aunt Claire being the one to find the the body and zoning out for two or three days.
But Aurora snaps herself out of it with a mental kick in the butt. She knows she is probably seeming to be rude.
"You run track? What's your record?" She can't help being curious. Oceana was great at basketball. Aurora didn't do sports, though she had done cheerleading for awhile until she broke a leg.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 2, 2019 15:19:00 GMT -8
Lucian chuckles sheepishly, rubbing the nape of his neck. "Nothing really impressive," he replies. "It's more just for fun than... breaking records or whatever."
He thinks back to his first year in track, right after his mother passed away. How tumultuous his emotions were. How much he hated feeling so much. He remembers waking up to hear little Levi's sobs through his bedroom walls, an occurrence he still sometimes experiences.
"It's nice to meet you," Lucian adds to Aurora.
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Post by Joelle on May 3, 2019 11:45:02 GMT -8
"I was just curious. My cousin Oceana is,,, well, we're in high school, but she could be semi-pro basketball if she wanted. It's nice to meet you too. Perhaps if she knows he suffers trauma too, she won't be so embarrassed about sort of zoning out. But she doesn't know that yet. "Oh! What grade are you in?"
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 3, 2019 11:50:10 GMT -8
"I'm a, uh, a sophomore," Lucian replies. Has it already been almost three years? "How about you?" he turns the question back to her.
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Post by Joelle on May 3, 2019 12:16:33 GMT -8
"Me too. We could...." she's suddenly shy. "Maybe eat lunch? I don't know.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 3, 2019 12:17:37 GMT -8
Lucian feels his face turn pink as he stammers out his response. "Uhh, yeah, umm, that- that would be... great. Really great."
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Post by Joelle on May 5, 2019 11:01:35 GMT -8
For some reason, she feels she has to tell him about the uncomfortable thoughts she's been having, "Umm... I hope this doesn't make you uneasy, but, since you just moved here... and I hope we're friends now?" She says, ending it on a question to make sure. Since you just moved here... you may hear some things. "I... she pulls a wrinkled, folded obituary from her purse, She'd always kept it. Her mom had been so pretty. "Everyone who's been here awhile... knows." she says slowly, then hands it to him. "I just thought for some reason, so should you. " She shakes her head. "I'm an idiot to have done that just now, but... I've been thinking about it a lot lately. The..." She points to the obituary to clarify. Stupid move, Aurora Cadence, she thinks to herself. She wonders if her mom is telling her, or if she's laughing at her right now too, over a cute guy. www.tapatalk.com/groups/berkshireglen/viewtopic.php?f=61&t=4243&p=5610638&hilit=Funeral#p5610638
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 5, 2019 11:18:21 GMT -8
As he reads the slip of paper, Lucian slowly makes his way over to the couch, sinking into the cushions. A moment of silence passes, his thoughts running every which way as he tries to process what he read. He can see now that she is clearly grieving, a feeling he understands all too well.
Logan breaks the silence, crawling up next to her older brother and peering at the paper despite being unable to read it. "What's it say, Luci?" she asks sweetly.
"I'm so sorry," Lucian says, voice no louder than a pin drop. He clears his throat, buying himself more time to string a coherent sentence together. "I..." He turns fully towards Aurora, making full eye contact with her for the first time since he returned. "We..." He gestures to himself and the triplets. "We, umm, we lost our mom too. Not- nowhere near how you--" He lifts the paper instead of releating the words. "It's hard, huh?"
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Post by Joelle on May 5, 2019 11:55:12 GMT -8
(OOC: I'm going to assume she's still on the couch.)
She's not crying, but she's shaking a little, wondering how he will react. But then he basically just asks her if it's hard. "Yeah. " She suddenly feels like her chest is being crushed and her breathing becomes heavier. She tries to put her head between her knees" She doesn't want to break down in front of the little kids, but her body is reacting too fast. "When I told the kids to call me Rory," she explained. "Mom and I... those last three years... we lived with a Jewish couple who called me that. "When she died... Oh, God, the fighting. "I loved Asriel and Elisheva, Still do, really. I was 6... and I hadn't seen my grandparents in three years. How was I supposed to react? But I'm still surprised at how brave I was. I called her nuts. I mean she was yelling... trying to work it out in front of the whole stinking town. Like... did she have to? That minute? I needed time, we all did. Occasionally, Aunt Celine still has nightmares about that. Something happened from her own past that was similar, but more private. And the custody hearing was even worse if that's possible." After a few minutes, she realizes where she still is and hopes the kids haven't understood, She doesn't want to scare them. She looks up at him. "Maybe we should...go somewhere? I don't know! This is ridiculous of me! I just met you literally like 15 minutes ago. I don't mean to put all this on you so soon." Putting her head between her knees on a couch- the kind you just sink into- is difficult. She actually feels like she needs to go to the hospital, even though it's just a panic attack. And suddenly she has to say that. "It's not working! I can't quite position my head. But it's just a panic attack. A doctor couldn't help. I have them sometimes."
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 5, 2019 12:02:54 GMT -8
Lucian watches as this girl has a full on breakdown in front of him. Unsure how to handle his own, he keeps to himself, his knees pulled to his chest. When she finally finishes, he takes a deep breath before replying, "Yeah. No. It's... It's okay. It's, umm, it's pretty traumatic stuff and I'm- I'm sure losing your mom the way you did is even worse. Our mom just had cancer. I can't imagine..."
He looks out across the living room to see his three youngest siblings looking up at him with teary eyed questioning faces. "You guys wanna watch a movie or something?"
"Can we watch The LEGO Movie?" Lavender asks softly.
"Uhh, yeah, sure," Lucian replies, his response greeted by halfhearted cheers from the triplets.
Once the movie is in and playing, he turns back to Aurora. He gestures to the kitchen. "We can talk more if you need to," he says softly.
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Post by Joelle on May 5, 2019 12:10:16 GMT -8
(OOC: You posted before I edited, so here goes.) "I don't think I can get there. This couch is hard to position my head right on." She realizes how stupid that sounded, even if she's dizzy. "Don't... worry. My head is still screwed on." Even in the midst of her panic. she starts to laugh. Breathlessly,
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 5, 2019 12:54:53 GMT -8
(OOC: Oops. Con of being fast to reply. 😬)
Lucian glances from her to the triplets to the door, a brief, breathless moment of confusion. It's not that he hasn't witnessed a panic attack before. He has and they're just as scary to watch as his brother describes them as feeling. At least in his mind.
"Hey, umm..." Lucian stammers, hoping the triplets stay as transfixed by the movie as they have the last hundred times they've watched it. So far, so good. "Is there- is there anything I can do to... help?"
If this were Lawrence sitting in front of him, Lucian would know exactly what to do, but he knows that everyone is different and he doesn't want to do something to make matters worse.
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Post by Joelle on May 5, 2019 13:07:47 GMT -8
(OOC: I feel like one of his brothers should come in. He should just maybe show him the obit and tell him everyone knows, so she warned him.)
"I- I feel like you should call 911. But doctors can't do anything. I mean... wait, don't they give you a bag to breathe in? Yeah. Do that." She's desperate, trying to find some way to stop this.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 5, 2019 13:27:58 GMT -8
"A- a bag?" Lucian mumbles, peeling himself away from the couch to the kitchen. He doesn't know what he's doing, hardly feels like this moment is actually happening. It could all just be a dream... right? He asks himself the question every time he pulls out another drawer and every time he slams it shut with no luck finding a bag.
Just as he slams the last drawer shut, on the verge of screaming, the front door opens. Lucian dashes to the door in time to stop Lawrence before he enters the living room. "Lawrie, I don't know what to do!" he whispers. "I came home from track and- and- and the babysitter was still here and- and I guess we, like, I dunno somehow started talking about, like, mom aand how our mom djed and how her mom--" He cuts himself off by handing Lawrence the obituary Aurora had given him. "And then she just sorta started... panicking. I dunno what to do! She asked me for a bag or... something?"
Lawrence reads the paper once, twice, three times, breathless as sympathy for the girl rises in his chest. Silently handing the obituary back to Lucian, he enters the living room. He notes the triplets, seated like fixtures in front of the television as the absurdly cheery movie continues to play. He kneels in front of Aurora, his hands resting on his knees.
"Hey," he says softly, "can you take a couple breaths with me? Just one at a time. Count them with me."
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Post by Joelle on May 5, 2019 13:52:29 GMT -8
(OOC: Maybe she could get kind of close with Lawrence, as a brother figure. She has no siblings, and he has panic attacks too. Too perfect!)
She doesn't know this guy, but his voice is so soft. "My... head hurts..." she admits. "I mean...everyone... knows here. It was... a warning, honest... other...wise I wouldn't have... I didn't mean to... do this. My chest hurts... Tears seem to be clogging her airway, but she finally tries to count her breaths a little. Her chest still hurts. She needs him to know she didn't mean it the way it might have sounded when Lucian told it. It tuly had been for his own good, sort of. But she can't make any noise except her breathing,
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 5, 2019 17:24:35 GMT -8
(OOC: Ooh! Yes! I like that idea. ☺)
"You're doing great," Lawrie says, taking a couple breaths with her. "I know it might be hard. But can you take a couple longer, deeper breaths now?" He demonstrates, breathing in for four seconds, holding for two, and breathing out for four. It's a trick he sometimes uses himself.
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Post by Joelle on May 6, 2019 5:29:05 GMT -8
It is hard. It hurts. But at last her tears are no longer in her airway. Now they're on her face. "It was.. a warning!" she says again,pleadingly, wanting him to get it so terribly, as she desperately manages the first breath. "I-didn't mean it the way it must have sounded. And...wait... she manages the second breath, but it still hurts to breathe. "Geesh, is this asthma? I'm scared to even test for it, because they make you do... well, this,,, at the test." Little Julian Kaehill, who had asthma himself, had told her that one day when she watched the kids, his eyes round from remembering. I mean... I haven't been diagnosed. But they're getting worse. They always... happen, like about from November to May- my birthday is the 20th-. But this is... the worst one...so far, ever." She gulps in another breath. "In front of two guys who I've known for,,, a combined total of... I don't even know, but... not long. And then," she says, meaning Lucian".. "He's cute." She doesn't know. really, maybe less. And despite that her chest still aches, But she blushes.But finally, about six breaths later, she relaxes. Kind of. She might need to go to the hospital. But everyone except Aunt Celine is working. She's a pastor's wife. So she knows that she will put it off, and he might be able to tell by the look in her eyes. She wants whoever this guy is to tell her it's OK. Lucian didn't sound like he meant it, exactly, because he'd been panicking a little too, trying to comfort her but not knowing how to help someone with a panic attack. Well, at least, it sounded like he hadn't known. (OOC: This was like... way before you joined. But Celine and Theo have their own adorable but embarrassing (on Celine's part) story of how they met. By the end he asks her out. I'm going to start a thread with Elizabeth included to have them tell her, but you/ they are welcome to join it... somehow. I can't think how to get them there, though. Ideas? The story for you to read: www.tapatalk.com/groups/berkshireglen/the-andrieux-family-arrives-for-dinner-t645.html )
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 6, 2019 5:54:10 GMT -8
"There we go," Lawrie says with a smile as he watches her begin to relax more. "You're doing great. Better with every breath." He turns to the entryway, waving Lucian back into the room. "I'm Lawrence," he adds. "Or Lawrie as my siblings call me."
Lucian gingerly takes a seat on the couch a couple feet away from Aurora. He wants to apologize, wants to tell her how much he wishes he had known what to do. Instead, he ended up just feeling (and oh, god, probably looking) like such an idiot.
"Now that you're a little calmer," Lawrie adds, repositioning himself from the floor in front of Aurora to the couch beside her, "is there anything you need right now?" He makes sure to keep his distance, hands to himself as he awaits her response.
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Post by Joelle on May 6, 2019 5:58:47 GMT -8
"I- I don't know. Did you hear what I said? They make you do this at an asthma test, and... I can't do it again, please!" She looks at him in panic still, but it is from that sentence, not because she can't breathe.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 6, 2019 6:11:32 GMT -8
"Okay, okay," Lawrie says. "No more breathing. You seem to have that under control now anyway." He glances at Lucian, who still sits rather far away. "You doing okay, Lucian?" he asks. The way Lucian greeted him, Lawrie had dreaded the idea of his brother going into a minor panic himself. Which is unusual for Lucian. He must really like this girl.
Lucian nods. "Yeah. Umm... Yeah, I'm- I'm okay," he manages to mumble.
"Good." Lawrie turns from his brother to find all three triplets staring at them. Crap. He'd forgotten about them. How long had they--
Before Lawrie has time to even finish his thought, Lavender shyly approaches Aurora, climbing up onto the couch beside her babysitter and wrapping her cute little five year old arms around her. She whimpers, "Are you okay?"
(OOC: I just wanted to say thanks for writing out actual, full length responses. It's nice to actually write with these again instead of one, maybe two lines max per response.)
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Post by Joelle on May 6, 2019 9:29:31 GMT -8
OOC: I agree 100%,Like, I love everyone here, but as far as style of writing (I don't know what the actual word is, but you know what I mean, I think.) yours and Elizabeth's are more like mine.)
As the movie is still playing- a little more to go- she takes one more slow breath, not sure how to ask this question. "I... this is a weird question, but how long was I- out? Like I said, I have them from November to May, that was the worst ever." She looks from Lucian to Lawrie. "My breathing may be better, but I'm actually a little dizzy. When it's especially bad... well, I haven't fainted yet... so I won't think of that, just,,, you should know. " Why? Why is she telling almost total strangers this medically important stuff? But maybe, they're in her life for a reason now. A gift from her mom? Suddenly she's laughing and trying to wipe her eyes from the tears that had clogged her airway. "Ugh, do you know what I told him?: She says to Laurie. "I said- *unstoppable giggling* I- I said that I couldn't... you know, get my head between my knees when I tried to stop it myself. That was scary- that I couldn't stop it myself, this once. Like... because this thing is so easy to just fall into, and I said, 'This couch is difficult to position my head right on.' And then I was like... because I thought he looked,,, horrified... 'Don't worry, my head is still screwed on!' I was dizzy- but I realized- even though I was kind of gone in s wsy, but not quite- how stupid it sounded and couldn't breathe but wanted to laugh! Geesh! she was embarrassed, but halfway finding it hilarious
She's a little calmer, but she leans her head against the couch. She counts off the holidays. "Ummm, let's see...um, in order. Thanksgiving, Christmas, Epiphany-that's my mom's birthday- the... you know... in February, Easter- she planned the best egg hunts... She sighs heavily, back in her memories- but only for a second- "Mother's Day, my birthday, and last but not least, Memorial Day." Come to think of it, that's not the only reason she panics on Mother's Day. She misses her mom, but also doesn't trust her grandparents totally, though she loves them to no end. "I- Mother's Day isn't just about my mom. It's also because...I have no one I can trust. I was such a brave little girl! I wish I could be that way now... but she was yelling- with the Katzes- about where I should live, in front of the whole funeral. Like- did everything have to be worked out that minute? And Aunt Celine- something about her biological parents- I don't remember, but- she was just... she shut herself away." she explains." I don't remember what happened after that, but apparently they'd made a promise never to yell in front of her, when she first came to them at 13 so I had to watch that, too, so brave little Rory called her grandma nuts!" Despite the sad memories, she can't help smiling. "Sometimes I wish I could be that brave again- that's why I call her Rory, because that person is gone- when they yell. But... anyway, you can love someone, or live with them, too, but that doesn't always include, like, I don't know the word mental safety> If there can be mental abuse, there has to be an opposite. Trust. They broke both of our trusts." As Lavender climbs on the couch and hugs her, Aurora shakes her head yes. "I will be, now. Do you want one,too?" She holds open her arms. She thinks she'll be OK anyway. Maybe she'll never be truly OK again. But hugs do help, and she manages a shaky smile over the little girl's head for everyone else in the room.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 6, 2019 9:48:45 GMT -8
Lawrie and Lucian both fall silent, watching their younger sister nestle into Aurora's side. She seems so small there next to the older girl. Small but content. Like she's found her purpose at this moment in her life.
"That's a lot to deal with," Lawrie breaks the silence. "Do you have anybody you can talk to about this? I-" He cuts himself off with a nervous little chuckle. "I know that it's helped me a lot."
Lucian glances at his brother as Lawrie talks. He knows what Lawrie refers to, has seen firsthand the effects of trauma on a young life. He sighs, tucking one leg under him, wishing he had Lawrie's ability to handle this situation. He wants to reach out to Aurora, but everything he thinks of screams wrong! to him. Nothing feels right, so he stays silent.
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Post by Joelle on May 6, 2019 10:52:02 GMT -8
"Yes and no. Mostly yes, but I mean- losing my mom itself is not the worst thing, you know? I mean- sorry. Goodness, what's wrong with me today?" She pauses and blushes and she's trying not to cry, but the tears are starting, but they're thankfully the silent kind. "I- I see a psychologist in Neighboring City, but... I need... help they can't give me. Or can they? Anyway, I'm not sure, but I'm afraid the answer will be no, especially about,,, I want to live with Uncle Theo and Aunt Celine. We kind of bonded- after- but she got married a few weeks after, on the 25th. And- the end. My grandparents won. Because I was six. I'd change it...I would. I don't think-" her voice becomes a little softer, like she's telling a secret. "I don't think... mental abuse,,, like that... is given the same priority as..." She can't say the words. Already the kids have wormed their way into her heart. "Fix it, Jesus." It's a prayer. She looks down at Lavender against her. "I want to be a court advocate for kids. That's why. Like I said, even though I don't know the word, there's an opposite of mental abuse. But me? With me, they won. And I don't know how to change that. I could go to court, but then I'd need 2 psychologists! One to get evidence for my case, and one to... keep me calm around the chaos." She tries to wipe her eyes, but it's pointless.
"And- school- I can't have any friends. I have to tell them before the adults do and they feel betrayed. Ick."
Her eyes find Lucian. "That's why I warned you and then- my body reacted too fast.And the other thing- I'd tell my aunt and uncle I want to live with them, but...you know. The court. The yelling. So it doesn't matter. I mean it does- but... I'm so tired of anger!"
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 6, 2019 11:11:27 GMT -8
"It sounds like you've gone through a lot," Lawrie says softly. "Stuff like that is... damaging. You're definitely right about that. But you seem stronger than you know. Or want to admit maybe."
Lavender looks up at Lucian as Lawrence speaks. She takes Lucian by the hand and drags him to sit closer to her and Aurora, and Lucian finds himself painfully aware of how close he has now become with Aurora, on both a physical level and a psychological. "I'm your friend, though, remember?" he says, his voice a husky whisper.
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Post by Joelle on May 6, 2019 11:46:42 GMT -8
She smiles at Lawrie, but it's a sad one. "Thanks, but... it's like... if I did tell them, how much stronger can I be? Can I go through court and not... you know, like I just did? What if I lose? And I'm so tired! I can't even with that pressure. And I've- I've... I make people uncomfortable. I've never had anyone say that and mean it, or some people sound like they're nervous about it. I'm just the girl whose mom was...,"
She sighs. "Aunt Celine told me that my grandma called...it... thinking about it. If she really had been thinking, though, she would have considered us. If that other thing is called thinking about something, I don't ever want anybody to think about me again! Or any other child. Or a certain kind of adult, if you know what I mean, those like Aunt Celine who've been... thought about... too much and can't shake it years later."She leans a little closer to Lucian and smiles at the kid who brought him to her.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 6, 2019 12:03:48 GMT -8
Lawrie takes one slow breath as he gathers his words to reply. "You don't have to always be strong," he says, still trying to formulate his thoughts as he replies. "I, umm, know how tough that can be. How draining. And court..." Lawrie exhales, as long and slow as his previous inhale. He never went to court himself, but he could have. He almost did but... "Court's even more exhausting. I wouldn't blame you for not wanting to put yourself through that."
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Post by Joelle on May 7, 2019 8:47:11 GMT -8
"I don't want to... but...I can't... you know, not have...something. I don't mean friends this time, but... someone to be like a mom... or a dad...and I have no siblings, either so... it's just me and my crazy grandma that I still don't trust fully and neither does my aunt. And I love my grandpa, and he... he's not like her, but it almost doesn't seem like he heard her for awhile, and when he finally did, he tried to salvage...something...I don't even know what was left...for Aunt Celine and me, but he was too late. So I have to, even though I might not make it through very well physically- or there's no one. I love my other aunts and uncles, but even Aunt Carmen didn't see Aunt Celine was in trouble- physically too, from a particularly bad case of dehydration- until after the fighting. So there are no two better people who...understand this whole thing more. But I don't want to go- again- when the custody battle the first time was so uncomfortable and at the same time absurd! So..." She shrugs. Like she said, she was just tired of anger.
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Post by starletinwaiting on May 7, 2019 9:01:18 GMT -8
"You've clearly thought a lot about this, huh?" Lawrie says with a soft smile. It's a lot to process-- for her, for him, definitely for Lucian. Thank God it's probably flying over the triplets' heads. "I know we've just met you, but if there's anything we can do to help, even if it's just give you a little bit of a respite, we will. My cousins have dealt with custody hearings time and time again. We've seen the toll it takes on people."
Lucian nods, thinking about some of the phone callls they've received from their Uncle Brian while they were in the middle of a custody case. The exhaustion in his voice... The frustration... He recalls his oldest brother, Eric, giving them advice. And then he remembers.
"Eric's a social worker."
Lawrie glances at Lucian, adding as an explanation, "Eric's our older brother. He's seen some pretty tough cases."
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Post by Joelle on May 7, 2019 10:05:28 GMT -8
"That's the thing, I was only six, but you know how some kids just... know things? I knew...this wasn't going to end well. But as for present evidence, I just- still don't trust her, and Aunt Celine doesn't either. She hasn't done or said anything else. We know, but we also just have that shared memory and our guts to trust. That's it. And0 and- " even though she's starting to cry again, she catches his words. "Do you think he might help? I mean-I didn't mean- it's just- are our guts and a memory that happened to both of us enough? And if it's not enough- am I safe? Really?- I mean- other than here? Because I don't know."
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